#I'M DEVASTATED ONCE AGAIN
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dalfurawa · 2 years ago
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CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW when eric is singing the lines “taking me with your song” and “i cannot get over you” you can see him smiling??
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LOOK AT HIM
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HE CAN’T HELP BUT TO SMILE when he’s remembering her and singing about her!! like he’s resigned himself to the fact that she’s already consumed his entire being!!!! our simp king
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secriden · 1 month ago
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Absolutely heartrending because it just hit me that before Bison's phone call, Fadel was actually began to believe that he'd been wrong to suspect Style. Because despite the evidence stacked against Style -- and remember, it was Fadel that spells out the reasons they have to be suspicious of Kant and Style -- Style is so incredibly genuine here and Fadel, in truth, wanted to believe in him.
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I think it's possible that Fadel actually saw Style through the window here, but pretended not to because he had to take a moment to prepare himself. But if you see where Style is standing and the way the patio is lit up, there's no reason why Fadel shouldn't have seen him from where he was by the tables before he turns to go behind the counter.
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Fadel: I was thinking of going to your place. But you were more impatient than me, huh?
This would also explain how Fadel is able to say this before Style even has the chance to make a sound. I had expected Fadel to wait and see what Style would say, to play it safe and observe; but no, Fadel immediately sets their dynamic back to the assumption of familiarity that their relationship was on before he disappeared for a week. The assumption that he could show up at Style's house unannounced and Style would welcome him.
This feels incredibly intentional. Fadel wants to see how Style is going to react to Fadel acting as if nothing strange happened. If Style was an informant, he should be confused and Fadel may catch him out in a lie.
But Style's performance is flawless:
Style: Where have you been? You didn't reply any of my texts! (punctuation added for emphasis and to mimic Style's tone)
He says this and the whine in his tone is a clear affirmation of that same assumption of familiarity. This is the tone used by someone who is secure in the knowledge that they are owed an explanation; this is the tone of someone in an established relationship who feels justifiably wronged at being left out of the loop.
And I cry a little bit more at the thought of Fadel reading those texts -- Style by turns frantic and confused and worried -- and refusing to respond. Or worse, receiving them and refusing to even read them because Fadel doesn't trust himself to tell the lies from the truth anymore.
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At this point, Fadel seems to waver a little bit in his resolve to "test" Style. I think he was a little taken aback that Style didn't seem to be even a little bit weird about his abrupt disappearance for a week. His reply takes on a quality of gentle pleading and the way he's speaking is exactly like a boyfriend who knows he messed up. But because these lines are a lie, Fadel cannot meet Style's eyes as he says them. It's only when he says "I was busy, too" (not a lie) that he's finally able to squarely meet Style's gaze again.
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And Style continues to be so convincingly NORMAL because all of this is real for him. This is just genuinely Style, the boyfriend, who actually wants to know where his boyfriend disappeared to without notice for a whole week. Nothing about his body language or tone has even a hint of inauthenticity because there is none. Style means every single word and meets Fadel's gaze squarely as he says them.
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It genuinely looks to me like Fadel thaws significantly at this point. He suddenly looks less stiff and the way he delivers this line contains so much more inflection, it becomes cajoling. He even begins to more consistently meet Style's eyes as Fadel begins to allow himself some honesty. Fadel's logical brain knows that the circumstances surrounding Style coming into his life are riddled with inconsistencies, but he both senses and WANTS to see Style's sincerity. The shields that Fadel had up are melting in the face of Style being present and unchanged from what Fadel remembers.
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Stay, Fadel all but says, let me make it up to you. Fadel offering to make food for Style (@braceletofteeth please hold me as I cry about this!!) is also significant because the last time Fadel made food for Style (the burger) is when he was softening towards Style after Style helped out at the diner during the rush crowd. Fadel is a creature of habit and all that he's learned of late are the ways Style is easy to love.
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They begin to fall back into their usual, playful banter and teasing dynamic. Style leans back against the table (and the way he's all unspoken surrender and submission -- throat arched up and bare and vulnerable -- truly makes me feral), turns up the flirt and Fadel responds in kind. And yes, Fadel means his question on some level but you don't get the sense that his heart is in the interrogation. Fadel may be going through the motions, but this is just Style being himself, exactly as Fadel has come to know (and love), so nothing is pinging as wrong to Fadel.
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I mean, just LOOK AT FADEL'S EYES!! His expression is so so soft and tender and wistful. He wants this. He wants so desperately to believe that this is why Style was texting him throughout the week. He wants to have Style in all the ways that include and go beyond the physical; like Style offering his affection is everything Fadel didn't think he could wish for.
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It's almost cruel the way Style's touch so utterly disarms Fadel. Because, while it is part of the games they've been playing, so much of their interactions have also been grounded in genuine feelings and moments of intense vulnerability on both sides (although neither of them know this for sure!! T_T). Style's hands on Fadel's body literally removes the last stretch of distance between them and that odd unease lingered over the way Fadel spoke and held himself at the start of the scene finally disappears.
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If we compare their expressions and the way they are holding themselves and, most importantly, touching each other by the end of the scene to what we see when Style first walks into the diner, it becomes apparent just how much ground Fadel has given in the span of those few minutes.
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It's the way Fadel keeps holding onto Style's hand even as he's turning to leave, maintaining that point of contact until the very last second.
Because with Style in front of him -- warm and familiar and carelessly affectionate -- Fadel allows himself to slip back to the version of himself that woke up in Style's bed at the start of the episode, the version of himself that called Style's name for the first time and wanted to wake him up with the softest of touches. The version of himself that literally, physically couldn't let Style go.
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Which is why, when the call comes and Fadel's heart gets broken anew, Fadel remains devastatingly empty of anger towards Style.
Because it was Fadel's own fault for choosing to believe the lie.
Because it was a decision he made to allow his heart to rule over his head.
Because Fadel understands that Style only succeeded in "fooling" him once again because Fadel let him.
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So Fadel gives himself this truth, allows himself to finally take that step to bare his heart to Style, the way he promised himself he never would, but the way he so desperately wanted.
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And Style kisses Fadel because he doesn't realise that this confession is not a reward, but a judgement.
For Fadel is paying penance for giving in to his own foolish heart, and in so doing renders Style's love to devastation.
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butterflysonnets · 8 months ago
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absolutely insane that mike literally p a n i c k e d when will was like "well what about us?" because will wasn't even really making things gay he was honest to god just inquiring about the state of their estranged friendship and wondering why mike didn't make time to talk to him when they're supposed to be best friends but MIKE was the one having an aneurysm like "🏳️‍🌈⁉️ W H AT!!"
“WE'RE FRIENDS” “i know mike” “WE'RE!!! F R I E N D S!!” “right so why don't you call me — ” “I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND” “… that in no way answers my question"
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flufflecat · 4 months ago
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Today I got to have an entire 3 message long dm convo with Alex Hirsch. I am never getting over this high.
#Alex Hirsch#this is the greatest day of my life#I even managed to show total decorum#didn't even use any words like decorum#I wanted to. but I didn't.#didn't even use the word macabre. wanted to do that too. I used normal words that normal humans use#as to not sound like a complete and total tool#hopefully ahfkajgkkak#I restrained myself to only saying 3 messages bc any more than that and I'd have to publically execute myself for overstepping boundaries#and I didn't even use any key smashes! and only One socially acceptable emoji.#I can't stop myself from using emojis entirely. those are a disability accomodation at this point ahfkjskgjskgjak#hey are these normal things to think#I think so#I got his twitter message directly at the start of my train ride and I've been processing my emotions for the rest of the trip#I keep nearly flagging down the train attendants to be like 'hiiii can I tell you about the good news :) not in a jesus way I promise'#but once again: restraint 🙏#you're WELCOME train attendants#it was so funny though Alex was like 'lemme know what you want to have grunkle stan say!'#and even when given permission to talk I was like damn he's going to kill me if I send a message#but I sent it#and he was very very nice#and will be sending me the grunkle stan recording tomorrow (⁠✷⁠‿⁠✷⁠)#work is going to be physically impossible tomorrow#sorry customers please pardon me while I run to the produce cooler and scream at the top of my lungs for 20-30 minutes#fluffle talks#what's the opposite of emotional devastation. bc I'm that right now.
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secretsoftheuniverse1987 · 1 month ago
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Forgot that I put The Moon Will Sing on my Jamie Tartt playlist until I was singing "Tell me once again I could have been anyone, anyone else before you made the choice for me" while trying to make progress on the thumbs finale
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ukulelegodparent · 2 months ago
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Just went to uni and instead of doing anything spent 3h agonising about ending my relationship. I'm sure this is good and normal
#it. idk I just don't really wanna be single rn and deal with all of that#and also I have silvester and first new year weekend plans hinging on this person and I kinda really don't want to find something else to do#but by god#I mean maybe my expectations are just too high as to how much I see my partner (doubtful)#or her lifestyle (has a shitton of things going on) and personality (not super communicative) are just not suited for polyamory#(and I have the same problems but I'm not the person who has two partners)#(and the fact that I can't really get a read whatsoever on her other partner is not helpful. like we vibe on occasion but mostly#I just do not get him at all)#but idk. like. we see each other like twice a week and those are like. during dance and for a pubquiz#and maybe going to the library#and it's just like to my expectations we are barely doing the bare minimum I need to have my emotional needs met#so whenever something falls through I am immediately devastated#but again I feel like 'I would like to see you outside of a social engagement with our friends at least once a week#and additionally also would like to sleep in the same bed as you at least once a week' are not high expectations whatsoever#and yet ....#when did we last have sex? Oh idk in october? maybe? I don't remember#which is that super important to me in a relationship? no. but like I don't think it's bc neither of us is interested#it's bc since then we have not managed to sleep in the same bed while neither of us was either on their period or extremely tired#and idk maybe I should write this to them instead of like. venting on tumblr. like this is also very much on me#but like#idk maybe it just also is a sign that maybe I don't care so much about this relationship. but also I feel like I still care more than her.#which isn't great#idk advice?#it's just. this current situation has me regularly having several hour breakdowns bc shit's not working out once again.#and that situation I really don't like
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kindlythevoid · 2 hours ago
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On Abigail and Shawn's Relationship (Psych)
~By someone who's only halfway through Psych~
I actually really liked Abigail and her place in Psych. She's obviously a tie to Shawn's past, but I think she plays an important part beyond just being an obstacle for Shules. For one thing, she feels like a fleshed out character. She has a personality, and while it feels like it's meant to bounce off Shawn's, very similar humor-wise imo, it still very much feels like her own; she has her own ambitions and her own life outside of Shawn and Psych. She likes people, she believes in education, she's a teacher, these are all aspects of her that come out in her time on the show (trying to fix Henry and Shawn's relationship (which I address a lil in the tags), otherwise respecting Shawn's distance, going to her teacher conference instead of the skiing trip, leaving for Uganda for an opportunity she's wanted for six years). She's also still clearly affected by the fact that Shawn had stood her up way back in high school, and this connection is what makes her such an important character for Shawn's development, imo.
Abigail is her own person, but she also serves as a waypoint for Shawn. He gets to fix his mistake of standing her up, and he also learns how to function in a long-term relationship. While admittedly having the relationship start with a "Gus, I can totally do it, watch this" isn't the best, it's reasonable for his character and serves as a wonderful beginning point for his maturation arc. Throughout the relationship, Gus (and company) helps Shawn navigate the differences between a fling and a long-term relationship. He starts to mature and understand that he has to check in with Abigail, he has to make dates and stick with them, he has to have mature conversations with her, he has to respect her time, etc.
Furthermore, it also helps Abigail get over said past mistake. She gets to take her relationship with Shawn one step further, feel it out, see how it would have gone, as Shawn progresses from child-like understanding of relationships to a more mature, grown-up perspective. His repeated showing up, starting from the moment he turned down Juliet in the drive-in because he had a standing date with Abigail (even though he was in love with Juliet at the time; honestly one of the biggest bullets dodged in the show; I have never seen a situation handled so neatly. There was no two-timing, no lying (well, minor lying to Abigail, ig), and they really tried to reinforce their platonic relationship instead of ignoring a possible wedge between them. It was so... refreshing.) I would bargain actually heals something in Abigail, showing her that Shawn is willing to step up as well as that Abigail is someone worth showing up for. It isn't as clear an arc for her, but I'd wager it's there, at least in the background, which is what makes their relationship so interesting.
In the end, the relationship works as a waypoint for the both of them. Shawn learns what it means to be in a long-term relationship, preparing him for a future with Juliet. In return, Abigail has a chapter of her life closed on a high note and is able to move on with her life without the what-ifs and emotional burdens of her past.
#I started writing this half-way through season 4 after Abigail left for Uganda#gonna go back and look at it once I finish (the show or their relationship I'm not sure) (edit: I have looked after s4; I think it's good??#maybe this was on my mind because a friend of mine just recently got out of a long relationship#and I was helping rationalize by saying that the relationship served as a waypoint for the both of them#a sort of growth period and now they have to grow separately#and the psych relationships. were just??#like I love Shawn and Juliet so much don't get me wrong. but??? as far as “we're pushing off this ship so anyway have another ship” ships g#ABIGAIL AND SHAWN ACTUALLY WORKED SO WELLL???#like I know I just literally wrote an essay on why#BUT IT WAS SO REFRESHING???#I liked Abigail?? I thought she was great?? She didn't have any crap with Juliet or anyone else either which was fantastic???#AND SHAWN TURNING DOWN JULIET IN THE DRIVE IN#like devastating obviously but#OH MY GOSH ANY OTHER SHOW AND IT WOULD HAVE CAUSED SUCH MASSIVE PROBLEMS#either shawn and juliet would've gotten together on the side and it would've been a whole thing or abigail would've gotten her heart broken#again (either bc she was stood up again or bc she was being cheated on) or it would've been some weird wedge btwn shawn and jules too long#BUT IT WASN'T!?!?! Shawn told her that it was literally bad timing (that's it) and Juliet took it so well and then Abigail got her date and#yeah part of me believes that Shawn should have politely let her go after the drive-in date#but even so they're relationship was so healthy and wholesome??? like??#if not Shules then Shawn and Abigail FOR SURE!!!!#gosh I fuck with this show SO. HARD.#psych 2006#shawn spencer#abigail lytar#juliet ohara#shawn and gus#shabby#I think is the ship name which is so funny because it really is a “not too shabby” ship XD XD#also I know some ppl have issues with Abigail going and meeting with Henry anyway but for some reason I think that also works for her?? lik#she's a teacher; she talks to the parents if a kid is acting a way ofc if Shawn doesn't want to discuss it she'll go directly to the parent
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hopeinthebox · 1 year ago
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tagged by the tastemaker @cordiallyfuturedwight for the january receipts and would you believe it i'm actually on time
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tagging a few favs: @aprylynn @jiminsproof @thvinyl @jimin-gaon @visionsofgideontheninth @btscontentenjoyer @kimchokejin @jihopesjoint @eoieopda @monismochi <333 and you too if you fancy it
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perceptivehands · 11 months ago
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why do i care so much about fictional characters jfc
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esta-elavaris · 1 year ago
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On Halloween it'll be two years since I lost my home and faced 8 months of living out of a very kind friend's spare room while I tried to make something work in my old city - and it was shit at the time in terms of stress and being uh? Terrified of the future? But now, as I suspected at the very beginning of it all happening, I'm so, so glad it all happened the way it did, and that I didn't get the things I was praying for at the time.
There were crises of faith in the midst of it, and a lot of temptation to feel absolutely hopeless, but I still end up stunned at how much it really was all for the better whenever I contemplated it. Like y'know when people say that sometimes everything needs to shatter so it can be put back together in a better way? It was very that -- so if you're going Through It with life right now and looking for that sign that things will indeed get better, this is it 💜
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icapturedthecastle · 8 months ago
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I, for one, am very excited for a Haymitch centered Hunger Games book. He is my favorite character and I love suffering.
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awesomefroggy · 8 months ago
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some Amala moodboards, cause I love and also miss my little bird
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judesstfrancis · 1 year ago
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started watching a horror movie not knowing it was a genuine documentary bc every youtube rec I watched about this film led me to believe it was fake. devastated
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jun-apologist · 1 year ago
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ods movie finally out. i know that show like the back of my hand, will let y'all know of any and all differences once i watch it
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bestintheparsec · 2 years ago
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I just finished watching A Small Light and I am unwell
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queenerdloser · 3 days ago
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amazon count of monte cristo adaption is immediately superior bc it actually has the morrel family in it. they had the bag!!! they had the moment where it saved morrel from suicide!!!! despite the weird way everyone keeps pronouncing names, i'm invested in this one now!
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